TV Quizzes ‘Not a Scam’ Claims GMTV - 26 April, 2007

A shadow was cast over TV quiz programs again this week when it was discovered that telephone quiz entrants on breakfast TV programme, GMTV, had no chance of winning.

A spokesman for GMTV, calling from his villa in Majorca, said the broadcaster was extremely upset at the allegations. “These services exist to entertain our viewers and are not a scam. Anyone who has a complaint about a GMTV quiz should call our customer service hotline on 0845 666 666 for just £2 per minute.”

Consumer confidence in TV quizzes fell recently after a series of alleged scams were exposed. These included ITV Play, ITV’s now defuct ‘The Mint’ and the very popular ITV quiz ‘Keep Ringing Dickhead’, which consists of a hot presenter in a push-up bra and a phone number flashing across the screen.

One viewer, unemployed Ima Twatt from Rotherham, ran up a £9,000 phone bill in two weeks. ”It’s like… you know… youz call n that… and then youz win nuffink! Nah wot I mean? I wanted to win dem gold-plated fish fingers.”

A recent survey amongst callers of TV quizzes found that 29% were drunk, 54% were morons and that the remaining 17% will dial any flashing number. The survey also raised £2m in reverse-charge call revenues from those surveyed.

The government has refused to comment on the quiz scandals. Rumours have been circulating that the government may introduce its own TV quizzes as a way to reduce rising NHS costs - such as nurses.

Health Minister, Dr Penny Cha-Ching said, “Patients could text in their ailments and receive a cheery ringtone to listen to while they’re on hold. Then, if they win, they’ll have the chance to go to a clean hospital, but we can't guarantee it.”