Spoof Space Show Set To Revolutionise Television - December 8, 2005

This week, the new show Space Cadets promises to boldly go where no reality TV program has gone before. The show claims to be the biggest hoax in TV history by convincing a group of wannabe celebrity fools they are being blasted into space.

If successful, TV production companies hope to implement plans to replace all television programming with reality TV shows. “Why pay actors and scriptwriters when we can just pay a student to hold a camera?” said TV producer Ted Tastefree. ”People will watch paint dry if we tell them it’s lead-based and that someone might die from the smell.”

Future projects in development include ‘interesting’ but ‘cheap’ shows:

Binman - follows a team of rubbish collectors through the streets of Hounslow. Real life binman and star, Shane Chaverton says, “If da lids aren’t on tight, dat can ruin a days run, innit?”

Dumpzone - screened from inside a toilet cubicle in Piccadilly Circus, the show simply features the public shitting. Presenter Jimmy Carr will provide memorable commentary and post-shit analysis, such as “Ooo. That one looks like John Prescott.”

Ozone Countdown - a reality TV show marketed at viewers on Mars. Martian producer Zegbot stated, “We want to watch you humans pay for the way we were misrepresented in War of the Worlds. Who the hell was that short, obnoxious lead actor anyway? What a jerk.”

I’m a World Leader In a Major Conflict Without An Exit Strategy, Get Me Outta Here - follows the trials and tribulations of two hapless political leaders who told a lie that got bigger and bigger, but only managed to convince illiterate, American, pig fornicators that it was true, so their hair turned grey.